…. this is it…KaMa cHoPrA…enter and be dazed…

Life is good…

Never been this happy..

I never thought that 80sumthing was gonna feel this good. It feels great. Orgasmic.

People meet Happy. sigh.

been working two straight weeks now. as of posting time, have had only 4 hours of quality sleep, not that i complain. i’ve never been so energetic and productive in my 9 months in purgatory. been trying to step up. hope to be noticed soon.

It’s strange that I can not string words today as creative, passionate and whatever-you-may-call-it in the last nine months. I wouldn’t want to blame it ot the lifestyle that I lead now, nor would I blame it otr my sheer laziness. Must be the weather. Must be the season. Must be the time. Must be me. Me. There, I got it pinned down. For the longest time I know what I wanted to do in my life. I want to be in the "it" scene, I want people to recognize my work, I want to make a name for my self (and who wouldn’t want to? certainly not me). Now after a year out of school,a year of riding public transpo with everybody else, trying to scrape a living out of the industry that feeds the fresh grads, I don’t where I’d want to be in.  Just glad that I’m not in my burn out stage, not now. I feel like I’m a coffee bean that is being brewed, for how long I don’t know. All I want is to be done.period.

Going back, am proud to have grounded one of my deepest yearnings in life. To make my mom proud. I know she is, not that I’m bragging about it. Am just happy being able to take her out for lunch, not in the restaurant of her choice, since she always wants to go second class, but to the restaurants that I know she’d rather not go to. Buying her things that I know she wanted for God know’s how long but was never able to because there was always me going to school, me asking for allowance, me having to do projects and junks. Now, the wheel has reversed. It’s me treating her out, me buying her stuff, me giving her money (hehehe!)

God knows how good it feels to make my mom happy. God knows how I sunddenly seem to enjoy her company.. I just hope this feeling lasts for good.